In The Beginning
I mopped the sweat from my brow
and licked my lips. The hot sun made the back of my neck
feel as if it were resting atop a stove. The rest of the
team was getting a drink, but I was never the type to
need a rest. I figured I'd be tougher and a better
player if I went the entire practice without rest, and
without water. Why should I show the rest of the team
that I was weak? Everyone knows that you can't be weak
and be a soccer player at the same time. These people
would need me on the field to be strong and to be a
leader. Showing that I was weak would make me a target
for the other team. The spring was gradually turning
into summer, and it was getting hotter everyday.
Practice was getting tougher and tougher to outlast, and
the more I ran, the more I desperately wished that I
didn't care about being weak. I was tough, and not only
that, I was stubborn. I would never give in to the
weather. I jogged my last lap until I felt that my lungs
were on fire. I was so thankful that practice was ending
so that I could go home and end this horribly hot day
with a cold shower, some dinner, and my comfy bed.
The days were stretching on and
some drama was beginning around my school. It had 4
floors and a basement, portables, and absolutely no air
conditioning. The football team was amazing, but my
school had a reputation for being "ghetto." Mostly the
kids that went there were thugs, or just plain mean.
There were regular fights and regular police visits. We
had about 6 burly security guards that watched our every
move. Even though all of this went on, kids like me
could still feel kind of at home there, because it had a
great athletic program, and there were strong bonds
between the school and the students. I was a Varsity
soccer player, and I had it all. My best friend Katie
and I did everything together and we had so many
memories. I hoped with everything that I'd be able to
look back at these high school years with joy and
happiness.
Fat Chance.
About 6 months into my freshman year,
Katie changed. She started sleeping around with
different guys at the school. I felt stupid when she
asked me what all it was that I'd done with boys,
because the list was very short. Next to nothing
actually. The sad part was, I'd been dating the same guy
for more than a year, and we'd hardly done anything.
We'd kissed, and there's where it stopped. I never felt
comfortable around guys the way that she did. She always
had this natural action, and this natural flirt with
guys. They started really noticing her after she lost
her virginity. She was ok with touching guys. When she
flirted she'd put her hand on their arm or lean into
them as she talked. She'd put her lips near their ears
and whisper things that sounded as if they came from a
soap opera. I just continued being me, and continued
hanging out with her even though we were so different. I
never really cared much about appearance anyway. I was
one of those girls that would hang out with you as long
as they were fun, and funny. I was always "one of the
guys" and I had a wide range of friends from every
group. Everything seemed easy, until I ran into the
wrong crowd.
I Was Only Looking
Katie and I went to the Reserve
football game because my friend Austin made the team and
I'd known him forever. He asked us to come and watch so
we made a trip to the game and cheered. It was a pretty
great time. We got up and headed towards the lunch
concourse for a bottle of water because the heat started
pounding on our cheeks, and I could feel the sweat start
to bead at my hairline. I needed nourishment badly.
We scrambled off of the
bleachers trying to avoid stares from the rest of the
people there watching the game. I always felt nervous in
crowds. As I headed through the parking lot towards that
school I spotted a group of girls screaming obnoxiously.
They were throwing things at the cheerleaders and
yelling things I'd only heard on the Real World at the
football team. They almost looked drunk they were acting
so crazy. There were 5 of them and as we walked by they
spotting me staring at them.
"SLUTS! WHAT THE F*** ARE YOU
STARING AT, ARE WE DOING SOMETHING F***ING FUNNY?"
One of them screamed at me. I looked
away, but that would've been too easy. They started
walking towards us. One of those girls was a mammoth.
She was bigger than any girl I'd ever seen. I
immediately began to quicken my pace, but Katie's new
personality was taking over her again and she just had
to open her mouth.
"Who the f*** are you calling a
slut? All we are doing is walking into the school to get
a G** D*MN drink. You and your fat a** friends need to
turn around and continue being irritating as you were
before."
I suddenly felt a spark of bravery. I
opened my mouth, but people always made me so nervous,
nothing would come out. Finally, after a few seconds of
the girls staring Katie down, I opened my mouth and said
the dumbest thing you could ever say.
"Ya, you guys don't have much
room to be calling OTHER PEOPLE sluts.....look at the
things you're yelling at the football team....it's kind
of pathetic."
From that moment on I sort of
recognised that the rest of my high school experience
would be drastically different.
Why Did I Say That?
The next week at school was a
little awkward. It's funny how after you have a bad
experience with someone, you see them everywhere. The
first few months of my freshman year were going to
change....Big Time.